Desperate For A Friend

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Project Main Details

Desperate For A Friend 
Young adult male with earnest read. The intended result of the line is humor.

2012-02-20 09:40:37 GMT
2012-04-25 17:00:00 (GMT -05:00) Eastern Time (US & Canada) 
Yes (click here to learn more about Voice123's SmartCast)
0 direct invitation(s) have been sent by the voice seeker resulting in 0 audition(s) and/or proposal(s) so far.
Voice123 SmartCast is seeking 100 auditions and/or proposals for this project (approx.) Invitations sent by SmartCast have resulted in 0 audition(s) and/or proposal(s) so far.

Project Parameters

The Voice Actor should be located in:
To be defined
IVR, voicemail, phone systems, and on-hold messages
800 words
English - USA and Canada
Teenage Boy OR Young Adult Female
• Audio files must be delivered via email
There are no special pre-, post-, or production requirements for this project.
Not defined
The voice seeker is willing to hire either union or non-union talents for this project

Script Details

Young adult male with earnest read. The intended result of the line is humor.  
Hey there, my name is [First and Last]. Thanks for calling my [insert name here] hotline! I’m not going to lie to you - I don’t have a lot of friends, so I set this phone line up to let you know that I am willing to do literally ANYTHING for your friendship!

For example,

Need a ride to the airport? A spotter at the gym? A designated driver every time you go out? Call me any time and I’ll be there!

Want someone to clean your house, mow your lawn, or wash your car?

If you’ll be my friend, there’s nothing I won’t do for you!

Wanna borrow my X-Box while making it painfully clear that you have no intention of returning it? I’m your guy!

Wanna eat everything in my fridge while forcing me to eat nothing but moldly pudding cups?

Just promise me we’ll be friends forever!

Want to plant heroin in the backseat of my car, call highway patrol on me, sell the video rights to TMZ and then use the money to take my sister on a Mediterranean cruise while I rot in prison? Let’s do this!

Wanna cover me with honey, bury me in sand, and watch fire ants devour my eyeballs? If it’ll entertain you, then I’m in. That’s what friends are for!

So in conclusion, please, please, please, please, just find me on Facebook and send me a friend request!
It’s [First name, last name, hometown or whatever info is necessary to find the facebook profile we’ll set up for this guy]
I’ll be waiting for that Friend Request!

Why don’t you plant heroin in the backseat of my car, call highway patrol on me, sell the video rights to TMZ and then use the money to take my sister on a Mediterranean cruise while I rot in prison?

Wanna tie me to a chair, stick lit cigarettes in my eyes and eat everything in my fridge? HELL YEAH!

Or why not have sex with my mom, and then force me to take a Viagra and watch the sex tape. That sounds like a real swell time!

4. Need another player for a pick-up game? Don’t worry, I don’t even want the ball, I only play defense and rebound.

5. Cancel your AAA membership. I will now be your road side assistance.

6. If you ever need to shit really badly, I have a very nice bathroom.

7. I don’t mind if you grow marijuana at my house, as long as you swear you know what you’re doing.

8. You can bring girls back to my place and have sex in my bed, I’ll sleep on the couch, and cook both of you guys breakfast in the morning.

9. My DVD collection is your DVD collection. Feel free to borrow any and all of them with a permanent to-be-decided return date.

10. I will bail you out of jail no matter how much it is. If you skip town and I lose the bond money, I won’t even be mad as long as you promise we’ll hang out if you ever come back.

11. I have no moral qualms about being your alibi if you ever want to cheat on your girlfriend.

12. You can do your laundry at my place, and I’ll help you fold it when it’s all done.

13. Need a wake-up call? Just let me know what time and I’ll set my alarm to make your life easier.

14. Of course you can send yourself weed from California to my address. You can just keep it at my place and come smoke it there whenever you want.

15. I love giving rides to and from the airport, so whether you’re departing or arriving, please allow me to be a part of your travel experience.

16. Does the girl you like have a fat friend that you need me to run interference on? I’m the best wingman in the world, Maverick.

17. I totally don’t mind if you flirt with my girlfriend. May the best man win!

18. Let me know when your license expires. I can go wait in line at the DMV, and text you when your turn is coming up.

19. I will let you whip me, beat me and step on my nuts in heels, if you’re into that whole dominatrix thing. If not, that’s cool too.

20. If will help you move into your 4th floor walk up and lift all the heavy boxes myself. Not only that, I’ll help you box your stuff up before you move.

21. If we find any good buy one get one offers, I will buy one, you will get one. 
Please note that you should only use the script or your recording of it for auditioning purposes. The script is property, unless otherwise specified, of the voice seeker and it is protected by international copyright laws.

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