Project Main Details
United States, California,
indisputable center of attention, primping and basking in
the flash of cameras offscreen.
Welcome, welcome, welcome! So very
glad you could make it!
THE WORKER BEAVERS roll a red carpet into the Freestall
Barn. One of them props up a step and repeat patterned with
the Fair Oaks Farms logo. Set lights come on in a dramatic
sequence inside the Freestall Barn. Diva poses for a selfie
in front of the banner, and the Beavers photobomb it.
4D MOMENT: CAMERA FLASH
(focus on the photo still)
I’m Diva Mooreux, and it is my
absolute pleasure to introduce you
to Fair Oaks Farms, my lovely and
Back to Diva in front of the step and repeat, fiddling with
her phone. At the edge of the frame, we see STEMMIE trying
to weasel past the red carpet. Diva collars and detains her
in front of the camera. The Beavers giggle and scurry
And this is Stemmie, my little sis.
She likes to think she’s the brains
behind this operation.
Stemmie rolls her eyes and makes a face.
You must surely note the family resemblance.
Diva loves to talk up the amenities
here at Fair Oaks, but our farm is
about more than just luxury. Lucky
for you, I’m here. Now, if you’ll
Diva covers Stemmie’s mouth, picks her up, and hands her to
the Beavers, who cart her off sideways into the Barn.
Sorry, Stemmie! Love you, girl, but
we don’t want to bore the audience
with your science lessons! That’s,
like, lesson one.
Now, if you come right this way,
I’ll give you a personal guided tour of our swanky Freestall Barn, where me and my girls eat, sleep, and kick it like the queens we are. That is what you came to see, right?
Diva sashays into the dramatically-lit Freestall Barn amidst
camera flashes and general commotion from the cows gathered.
The feeding area resembles a trendy salad bar,
well-appointed with a modern sensibility. In contrast to the
smart environs, cows gorge themselves on enormous servings
of TMR along the feeding area. Diva walks straight up to the
Beaver behind the serving area.
I’ll have my usual.
The Beaver takes a shovel, and serves an enormous portion of
TMR into Diva’s trough. She takes a deep whiff, and sighs in
Ahhhh, that’s the stuff. Now come
Diva inhales the portion instantaneously. The Beaver heaps
another and Diva inhales it again. Repeat a few times until
the Beaver discards the shovel for a giant-sized one. He
heaps a giant-sized portion into Diva’s trough. Stemmie
takes a spot next to Diva.
I wouldn’t blame you for thinking
otherwise, but Diva isn’t just a
glutton. Grown-up cows like her eat
about 100 pounds a day of this
stuff in order to produce milk.
Diva brings her head out of the bowl momentarily.
(mouth full of TMR)
Not to mention maintain my
figure--looking this good is no
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