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Digital Solutions is teaming up with Blanchard Productions to work on a series of radio packages that will be marketed to satellite radio. The first is a comedic take-off of Bogey-type "film noir" detective movies. In fact, the starring character's name is Humphgart Bophrey. Our lead character is cast, but there are several "regulars" that we would like to start casting for now. Our budget is still being determined, but we think that we could offer at least $250 per hour for regular roles. "Drop-ins" would earn $150 per hour, one hour minimum guaranteed. We may have many episodes, and we may use the same actor for multiple roles, so this could be a lucrative project for the right people. Also, we will be producing other comedies, and dramatic renditions of American literary classics, featuring Twain, Hemingway and Steinbeck. Again, actors that we like from one show may well be given parts on others as well. We're getting ready to produce this detective comedy first, as we've already had a strong "bite" from one of the satellite companies. You can read for any or all of the parts that you feel are right for you. If you read for more than one part, please slate which part you are reading for. MP3 versions are preferred. No house reels. Thank you.
Aug 13, 2004 14:42:16 (GMT -05:00) Eastern Time (US & Canada) Aug 15, 2004 00:00:00 (GMT -05:00) Eastern Time (US & Canada) No (click here to learn more about
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0 direct invitation(s) have been sent by the voice seeker resulting in 0 audition(s) and/or proposal(s) so far.
Aug 13, 2004 14:42:16 (GMT -05:00) Eastern Time (US & Canada) Aug 15, 2004 00:00:00 (GMT -05:00) Eastern Time (US & Canada) No (click here to learn more about
)
Closed
82
0
0 direct invitation(s) have been sent by the voice seeker resulting in 0 audition(s) and/or proposal(s) so far.
Project Parameters
None
To be defined
IVR, voicemail, phone systems, and on-hold messages
Not defined
English - North American
Not defined
Young Adult Female OR Young Adult Male OR Middle Age Female OR Middle Age Male
Not defined
There are no special pre-, post-, or production requirements for this project.
Not defined
Not defined
Script Details
Yes
N/A
(1) Bophrey's secretary, Penelope Smart. Intelligent,witty, and 4 steps ahead of her boss at every turn. She tries to help him in any way that she can, because she really likes him in spite of (and maybe because of) his bumbling ways. You feel that maybe she's in love with Bophrey, and doesn't do a good job of concealing it.
" Mr. Bophrey, you're wife is on line two."
" You're on speakerphone sir...I'm afraid she heard that!"
" It's okay sir, I've always got bail money saved up for you"
" Oh sir, if you weren't married..."
" I can fix you a cup of coffee, but we're out of gin this morning."
"You drank it all before your audit with the IRS, remember?"
"It's your wife on line two sir. Should I put you thru, or lie like a dog?"
******************************************
(2) Lieutenant Doofusson. Bophrey's contact inside the police department.
If you're old enough, think of Detective Brennan on the original TV version of "My Favorite Martian". Macho, very suspicious of everyone. Sees a crime in every window. Would arrest his own mother for littering. A definite opposite to Bophrey's kind-hearted approach.
" Well Bophrey, caught any REAL crooks lately?"
" Oh, she's locked up in Central right now. Got picked up for littering."
" I did. But hell man, I witnessed it with my own eyes!"
" We're looking for the Back Alley Mugger. He's six foot five, two hundred
and ninety pounds, shaved head, a Harley tatoo on his left bicep, missing
most of his teeth, speaks in a raspy voice, and has an 8-inch knife wound
across his forehead. Might be hard to find him, 'cause his description fits
just about everyone on this block!"
"I gotta go. Hey Bophrey, it's raining outside...Pretty slippery out
there...you better put some more gum on your shoes! (laughs derisively)
"Hey man, if you need any help, call me...I'm at 1-800 GOTO HELL!"
***************************************
(3) Michelle Van Cleavage: Sultry, stereotypical gorgeous client. Aware of
her captivating beauty. She probably just murdered someone, but can
still wrap Bophrey around her finger. Perhaps Lauren Hutten-ish.
" Hello handsome. Are you the man I've been searching for?"
" My name's Michelle. Michelle Van Cleavage".
" My last name USED to be Flatt, but I married a plastic surgeon, and now
it's Cleavage.."
" I'm looking for a private detective, and I heard you're the best!"
" I need you to look something up for me."
" I said, look something UP, not look down my blouse!"
" Your fee? Don't worry..I've got whatever it takes".
" One more remark like that, and I may have to spank you!"
*******************************************
(4) Police radio dispatcher: (I'd like to hear both male and female reads)
Serious, although what he/she says is usually silly.
" Attention all cars, attention all cars. There's a sale at Dunlap Donuts until
2 am!"
" Calling all cars, there's a 10-69A in progress...Hooker trying to pick up a
Boy Scout. Asking him if he wants to earn a merit badge in human
relations"
" Attention all units. Please disregard the previous announcement...that
was just Barney Miller on my TV".
" Central Dispatch to Baker 12...Please return to the station. Your car is
on fire and the keys are locked inside."
" Attention all units! Shooting in progress at 307 Crownhill Drive. Wait a
minute...that's my mother-in-law's house......Never mind!
*****************************************
(5) Candy, the ditzy waitress at Joe's All-Nite Diner. Think Betty Boop in
voice and intelligence. In spite of her lack of cerebrality, her innocent
but well-meaning remarks often inspire Bophrey into realizing an important clue.
"Hi Baby! You want a nice cuppa coffee? Oh! Then you really should try
Arnold's Place, across the street!"
"Bophrey, next to my plumma, you're the smartest man I know!"
"Our regular cook is off tonight, so I thought I'd give it a shot. I
recommend my Mexican food plate, with Blueberry Salsa!"
"Well, the only place I ever cooked was at the Pancake House!"
" I KNOW my skirt is short, but it's my lucky skirt...everytime I wear
it, the place gets packed!"
"Bye Baby! And Bophrey...have you ever noticed that...no matter
WHERE you go, there you are!" (giggles)
****************************************
(6) Bophrey's wife, Gertrude. A shrewish, monstrous, malcontent who
finds fault with Bophrey at every turn. Make her mean WITHOUT resorting to loudness. Her evil should be sinister, but FELT more than heard, if you know what we mean. (Vincent Price rather than the Cryptkeeper...) Have FUN with this one...
" Allright you mangy scum! You be home by 7 o'clock so that we can go
out and still have a romantic evening, goddamn it!"
" My mother TOLD me that you'd disappoint me. Only time in her life
that the old bitch was right!"
" Bophrey, I want you to stop by the Army/Navy Surplus store and buy
a used parachute. I want to surprise Momma by making her a silk dress
for her birthday! Come to think of it, you better buy two!"
" You filthy piece of garbage! I've murdered smartass husbands before,
and I'm not afraid to do it again!"
" I wouldn't actually MURDER you dear. That's too quick....I want you
to suffer for a long, long, time!"
" Mr. Bophrey, you're wife is on line two."
" You're on speakerphone sir...I'm afraid she heard that!"
" It's okay sir, I've always got bail money saved up for you"
" Oh sir, if you weren't married..."
" I can fix you a cup of coffee, but we're out of gin this morning."
"You drank it all before your audit with the IRS, remember?"
"It's your wife on line two sir. Should I put you thru, or lie like a dog?"
******************************************
(2) Lieutenant Doofusson. Bophrey's contact inside the police department.
If you're old enough, think of Detective Brennan on the original TV version of "My Favorite Martian". Macho, very suspicious of everyone. Sees a crime in every window. Would arrest his own mother for littering. A definite opposite to Bophrey's kind-hearted approach.
" Well Bophrey, caught any REAL crooks lately?"
" Oh, she's locked up in Central right now. Got picked up for littering."
" I did. But hell man, I witnessed it with my own eyes!"
" We're looking for the Back Alley Mugger. He's six foot five, two hundred
and ninety pounds, shaved head, a Harley tatoo on his left bicep, missing
most of his teeth, speaks in a raspy voice, and has an 8-inch knife wound
across his forehead. Might be hard to find him, 'cause his description fits
just about everyone on this block!"
"I gotta go. Hey Bophrey, it's raining outside...Pretty slippery out
there...you better put some more gum on your shoes! (laughs derisively)
"Hey man, if you need any help, call me...I'm at 1-800 GOTO HELL!"
***************************************
(3) Michelle Van Cleavage: Sultry, stereotypical gorgeous client. Aware of
her captivating beauty. She probably just murdered someone, but can
still wrap Bophrey around her finger. Perhaps Lauren Hutten-ish.
" Hello handsome. Are you the man I've been searching for?"
" My name's Michelle. Michelle Van Cleavage".
" My last name USED to be Flatt, but I married a plastic surgeon, and now
it's Cleavage.."
" I'm looking for a private detective, and I heard you're the best!"
" I need you to look something up for me."
" I said, look something UP, not look down my blouse!"
" Your fee? Don't worry..I've got whatever it takes".
" One more remark like that, and I may have to spank you!"
*******************************************
(4) Police radio dispatcher: (I'd like to hear both male and female reads)
Serious, although what he/she says is usually silly.
" Attention all cars, attention all cars. There's a sale at Dunlap Donuts until
2 am!"
" Calling all cars, there's a 10-69A in progress...Hooker trying to pick up a
Boy Scout. Asking him if he wants to earn a merit badge in human
relations"
" Attention all units. Please disregard the previous announcement...that
was just Barney Miller on my TV".
" Central Dispatch to Baker 12...Please return to the station. Your car is
on fire and the keys are locked inside."
" Attention all units! Shooting in progress at 307 Crownhill Drive. Wait a
minute...that's my mother-in-law's house......Never mind!
*****************************************
(5) Candy, the ditzy waitress at Joe's All-Nite Diner. Think Betty Boop in
voice and intelligence. In spite of her lack of cerebrality, her innocent
but well-meaning remarks often inspire Bophrey into realizing an important clue.
"Hi Baby! You want a nice cuppa coffee? Oh! Then you really should try
Arnold's Place, across the street!"
"Bophrey, next to my plumma, you're the smartest man I know!"
"Our regular cook is off tonight, so I thought I'd give it a shot. I
recommend my Mexican food plate, with Blueberry Salsa!"
"Well, the only place I ever cooked was at the Pancake House!"
" I KNOW my skirt is short, but it's my lucky skirt...everytime I wear
it, the place gets packed!"
"Bye Baby! And Bophrey...have you ever noticed that...no matter
WHERE you go, there you are!" (giggles)
****************************************
(6) Bophrey's wife, Gertrude. A shrewish, monstrous, malcontent who
finds fault with Bophrey at every turn. Make her mean WITHOUT resorting to loudness. Her evil should be sinister, but FELT more than heard, if you know what we mean. (Vincent Price rather than the Cryptkeeper...) Have FUN with this one...
" Allright you mangy scum! You be home by 7 o'clock so that we can go
out and still have a romantic evening, goddamn it!"
" My mother TOLD me that you'd disappoint me. Only time in her life
that the old bitch was right!"
" Bophrey, I want you to stop by the Army/Navy Surplus store and buy
a used parachute. I want to surprise Momma by making her a silk dress
for her birthday! Come to think of it, you better buy two!"
" You filthy piece of garbage! I've murdered smartass husbands before,
and I'm not afraid to do it again!"
" I wouldn't actually MURDER you dear. That's too quick....I want you
to suffer for a long, long, time!"
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